Editor’s note: The following article is an op-ed, and the views expressed are the author’s own. Read more opinions on theGrio
Six years ago, the National Organization of Tireless, American Liars and Lowlifes Working Year-round to Preserve Inequality, Prejudice and Oppression (NOTALLWYPIPO) embarked upon a mission to honor the notable achievements of America’s underwashclothed community.
Despite rewarding the melanin-impaired community with a disproportionate number of Grammys, Tonys, Oscars, Emmys, political access, judicial appointments, financial wealth, educational opportunity and social capital since the day they began their quest to steal an entire continent, the world tends to ignore the most crucial aspect of Caucasian contributions:
Wypipoing.
What is wypipoing? Wypipoing is calling oneself a “patriot” while waving a confederate flag. Wypipoing is whining about widespread voter fraud while rubber-stamping gerrymandering, voter suppression and felon disenfranchisement. Wypipoing is screaming about freedom of speech while outlawing critical race theory. And if you find the term “wypipoing” offensive …
Congratulations, you’re wypipoing!
At the end of every year, we gather a diverse panel of wypipologists to nominate the worst and whitest in politics, news, entertainment and overall caucasity. Our slate of electors includes Black people, African-Americans, people who can’t shop in Victoria’s Secret’s “nude” section and women who use edge control.
As we always point out, not all white people can qualify for these accolades. However, if a white person has ever used the phrase “not all white people,” they are probably eligible.
Today, we recognize white excellence:
Here are the 2023 nominees and winners:
Worst new wypipo
- Mike Johnson: Even though no one likes him, the pro-life, pro-gun, anti-porn, anti-gay Christian nationalist congressman burst on the scene after Kevin McCarthy…
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